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Pain...

These are things I wish I knew in my teens or 20s, things I feel today at 48 years old would have positively impacted my state of mind and the course of my life.  My body has been in a lot of pain for the last long while now. Anywhere someone would touch, even to give a simple hug, it would hurt. I couldn't understand what was going on. In a very cognitive way I thought I was happy and that all was well. My work is going well. My relationships are strong.  But, after my surgery in 2018, I have learned and I understand completely that the body manifests energy in a way that matches your subconscious thought NOT conscious thought. I have not been able to figure out what I was holding on to that my body was manifesting as pain.  On Friday, I finally got an opportunity to meet my rock star of a yoga teacher, Sheetal, after 3 years.  Lockdown and my time in USA married with her family responsibilities, upon my return, had not allowed for us to meet sooner. She could see t...
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Comebacks ...

These are things I wish I knew in my teens or 20s, things I feel today at 48 years old would have positively impacted my state of mind and the course of my life.  Last night, I was cleaning up my desk and found a small gift wrapped box. It had no name or no note. Upon opening it I discovered it was a handmade album with heartfelt notes, on each page, from a student who used to study and spend hours and hours in my home while in college.  This student hasn't seen me or spoken to me in roughly 2 years.  How the gift got on my desk? I'm assuming she sent the gift with another student who put the gift in with my papers and forgot to mention that she had left it for me.  This morning, I reached out to her to thank her for the gift. Among many other things, she said she missed me. I responded with... "I miss you too a lot and have not been able to understand the distance you keep, but as with everyone else I am giving ya’ll the space you need to do what you need to and fin...

Dumping ...

These are things I wish I knew in my teens or 20s, things I feel today at 48 years old would have positively impacted my state of mind and the course of my life.  Dumping, nope not the kind where one person in a relationship lets the other one go. Unlike that dumping, this is rather cathartic and has a very positive impact on the brain.   The way it works is you keep loose leaf paper and a pen, by your bedside, and every morning just as you wake up, even before you brush your teeth, you write down every thought or word that comes to your mind. No filtering your thoughts just anything and everything. One morning I filled pages just with the words "yellow truck" I had no idea why, but I kept writing until I felt like I had nothing more left within me. Once you are done, you tear up the pieces of paper, throw them away and go about your way. You must tear and throw, this is not a journal, this is a release! I have used the Dumping technique at night when I couldn't go to bed...